Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Confederate Memorial Day

Just wanted to let you know that Tuesday is Confederate Memorial Day in Georgia.

You maybe thinking: What the hell? But in GA this is a Holiday.

I must apologize: I did not send my confederate flag Hallmark Cards on time, so you might get them a little late.

Viva la Confederacy! Oh we lost. oops!



P.S. For all my friends that were worried: Please resume destroying your bowels and other organs by eating the Wendy's Chili. There was no finger.

Killer Locusts...riiiight

Well, I can safely say that I did not watch Locusts the TV movie on CBS Sunday night. I was tempted, but I couldn't do it.

Why would I be tempted to watch that hokey piece of crapola you ask? Well, the truth is I do not have cable. I'll give you a minute to compose yourself....


Anyways as I was saying before you fell into a state of shock or possible laughter, I almost watched Locusts. But thank Pope Benny I didn't. I actually went to bed early.

Oh I know what your thinking: It had Xena: the Warrior Princess as a scientist! Yes I know, but locusts? Come on! I mean, Roaches, Bees, Praying mantis or even radioactive gnats but Locusts?

Favorite movie quote(from the commercial of course) "You screw with nature and nature screws with you." Give me a break.

If you saw it please let me know, I maybe persuaded to watch it. I have a friend (not for long) who actually TIVOD it. The truth is I want you to comment so I can laugh at you.



P.S. Brittany's preggers, and it wasn't me.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Dang! Wrong line again.

Why is it that I'm always get on the wrong line? Whether I'm on the freeway, in the supermarket or on the welfare line, I never get on the right one.

For example:

At the neighborhood supermarket I waited 30 mins behind this lady who had 23 items in the 10 items or less line. She then proceeds to order cigarettes which are evidently stored in the supermarket vault. Then she asks for a price check because her creamed corn
rang up for 80 cents instead of the advertised 79 cents. (She had one Can! ) The icing on the proverbial cake was how she then proceeded to break out the coupons and last but not least, you guessed it, paid in change.

The good thing is I got to read a whole National Enquirer. I love Bat Boy.



Monday, April 18, 2005

No Pope yet

Well, no Pope yet. It seems the first day of the Vatican Pope draft has gone bust. Possibly tomorrow.

I wonder if there is a Fantasy Pope League.

What? I'm just asking...Jeez.



Friday, April 15, 2005

Go Yanks

I'm sorry but I am a New York Yankee Fan. I've loved them since I was a kid.
I grew up in the South Bronx and they were and still are my Dream Team. Yeah, I liked them even when they sucked. It has been really heart breaking seeing them lose the last couple of years, but its part of the beauty of Baseball. You win some, you lose some.

Its a shame that baseball isn't the game I grew up with. Now there's all the controversy and junk. Nevertheless, I will probably miss most of the season. Maybe, I'll see the playoffs. But only if my Yankees make it.



Saturday, April 09, 2005

Will you take ugly to be your awful wedded wife?

Wow Prince Charles and Camilla finally got married. Awwww, ugly people in love. This is just a distraction to the crimes committed. That's right I said it: I think that Prince Charles killed....

Tupac Shakur, Biggie Smalls and maybe even Christopher Reeves. Dont trust those dumbo ears. He looks cuddly in a Howdy Doody kind of way but he is the pure representation of evil itself. Eh! but who am I to judge.

Oh well at least two more ugly people have made themselves unavailable.


Monday, April 04, 2005

another poem


To reveal this unspoken truth
with jagged words and broken letters

gashes and wounds
the fortress I once made

To deny me by deciphering
this is for my better

Leads me to desire
a lie that you once gave

Friday, April 01, 2005


Well, today I'll take a stab at poetry. Hey according to www.poetry.com I could be a $10,000 winner. Yeah, that's gonna happen. Anyway, here it goes:


The pain, Excruciating

anesthesia's all gone

wasting is your light

deteriorated by love.

Jealousy, knew me

my acquaintance for life

the unwanted visitor

dull blade of your eyes.

You, I'm addicted

self-destructed, alone

alone, in your presence

and my dying is slow.

Unbearable to watch

my trickling demise

how stupid of me

as I tremble with lies:

That maybe you'd notice

the blind will soon see

I don't walk away

knowing the dead one is me.

What do you think?



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