Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Weird things about lil ole me.

Dear Undies:

Grody jo-dee aka Sweet Mama Jama, tagged my sweet hiney. Actually, it went down like this: She drop-kicked me and put me in a head lock while her children went through my pockets. They were disapointed to find a stick of gum from 1984 and a linty raisin.

Anyways, she wanted me to tell you some weird things about me. Yeah, I know. I ain't weeerd!

Here it goes:

1. I love to make up stupid parodies of top 40 songs. Usually involving bodily functions.

For example: Kelly Clarkson's "Because of you" is transformed into a beautiful song about poo. Here are some of the lyrics:

"Because of Poo, I never stray to far from the sidewalk. Because of Poo, I learn to poop on the safe side so I don't get squirts."

(I never said they were Grammy winning. Sorry)

2. I am totally the reigning Car-Dancing Champion of the United States. I can jam like the best of them, but only when I'm driving. Anika(aka Ani Banani) is currently the Car-Dancing Champion of Canada. I can't wait till we do the International Car-Dancing Dance-a-thon in Samoa. It's going to be great.

3. I hate Brazil Nuts with a bloody passion. Damn portuguese speaking nut. Which, by the way, isn't really a nut in the first place. You are nothing but a nut impostor. Darn you to heck you evil nut from the bowels of hell! I hate you! Why can't you be more like the Cashew. Now, that is a nice God-fearing nut if I ever saw one. I shun you, Brazil nut! I.Shun.You!!

4. I can't tell the difference between Coke and Pepsi. Heck, even the generic crap taste the same to me. (I can just imagine the hate mail I'll get for this one.)

5. I love Rachel Ray. Everytime, I'm allowed to watch the show, you know when I'm not on time-out, I say "I love you" to the tv screen at 2 minute intervals each. I love you Rachel Ray! She is cooking for ME. I just know it. *twitching* *drooling*

Oh yeah, I am a wacko. If you'd like to know more of my weird habits, just read this blog.


PS thanks for talking to me. It sure beats the voices in my head. They are so rude. Love ya, mean it!
PPS Shannon and Superspygal there is no need to fight. There is enough of me to go around. Or maybe even Chauncey my janitor. He is Half Ucranian!


At 9:28 PM, January 11, 2006, Blogger Shannon said...

Ohhhh Undie, where to start, where to start...

First of all~ LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO @ your "Because of you" lyrics... that was messed up man!! I love that song but it was funny as hell!!

Second... you have a thing for dark haired beauty's huh? Stop blushing.. lol.. Someone better tell Spy!! You or chauncey bahahaha!

Third~ I was wondering why every time I coughmadecopiescough you wouldn't speak to me... just "direct" me...and the lights were always off... you and Chauncey got a good chuckle at Spy's and my expense huh? For shame, for Shame!!

This is the kind of company I am representing??

God I love this job =)

At 9:48 PM, January 11, 2006, Blogger Tanya Kristine said...

i too love brazil nuts. they are 'meaty' and i love 'meat'.

who the hell is that girl?

and i dont' think i can talk to you anymore. becuase anyone who can't tell the difference between coke & pepsi should be hung up by their little toeseys...'nuf said.

At 11:23 PM, January 11, 2006, Blogger SuperSpyGal said...

ROFLMAO ....I love that song !!'re deranged..and I mean that in the best way possible !!

Go easy on the's their culture to wear those little's not their fault that their nuts show through.....oh, wait...sorry, I was thinking something different...yea, I prefer cashews too

Shannon and I will flip for you...*tossing Gareth in the air*...heads I win, tails she loses !!

At 11:36 PM, January 11, 2006, Blogger gunngirl said...

I like Rachael Ray too. I like the show $40 a day. lol

I can pretty much tell the difference between Coke and Pepsi, but I don't like either very much. And I don't think I've had Brazil nuts.

Share with me?

At 1:57 AM, January 12, 2006, Blogger Tina said...

Ooohh Car-dancing, that is way cool - one of my pass-time favs! We could do it together and look better than the cooky couple of guys on SNL!!

Brazil nutz ..I'm with ya there. I mean wtf are they; they have no taste absolutely what so ever and its way too much nut to have no taste (yikes that didn't come out right).

Coke is sweeter and Pepsi has more kick and carbonation. Coke gal mahself :p

I'm still lauging at the Actors studio post - you're hilarious!! :)

At 7:51 AM, January 12, 2006, Blogger beadinggalinMS said...

Weird and whacko is the new black! Someone told me that awhile back. ;)

Racheal Ray-YUM-O!! Do you know she now has a magazine out?? I would loan you my copy but afraid of the pages coming back all sticky, ya know from you cooking.

Brazil nuts-yuck!! Cashews is the better choice.

Coke or Pepsi let me do a taste test and get back to you. Ok I am back..I will stick to my Dr. Pecker errrr I mean Dr. Pepper.

LMAO-at your song. I will probally sing this version next time I hear it.

mucho luvo and smooches Lindy-Lin

At 10:13 AM, January 12, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You could be the next Weird Al Yankovik...Maybe Undr Yank aBit or something! ;P

At 11:51 AM, January 12, 2006, Blogger grody jo-dee said...

can i be the car dancing junior u.s.a. champion? PLUZZZZEEE! huh huh, can i, can i??

At 12:38 PM, January 12, 2006, Blogger Gareth said...

Can I join in with the Car-Dancing Championships? I believe I meet the international criteria!

At 4:04 PM, January 12, 2006, Blogger Ben O. said...

Dude, you're a freak. But you probably already knew that. Don't worry, I'm one too. It'll be our lil' secret.

I once drank Pepsi exclusively all Summer just to get enough points to get a free pair of Teva sandals. I still wear them. Now that is worth a Meme right there.

Ben O.

BTW - Even though He-man is gay (and yes, he is), he can still kick your a$$, wring Skeletor's skeletal neck, deflect the advances of that Teela girl and (let me repeat . . . AND) singlehandedly (Man-at-arms was never that impressive IMHP) defend Castle Greyskull against the forces of eternal darkness.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Ben O.

At 4:05 PM, January 12, 2006, Blogger Ben O. said...

Naturally that should be IMHO . . .I'm not really sure what IMHP stands for, but I'm sure I just violated some part of the Internet Decency code by typing it . . . even though it was inadvertent.

Ben O.

At 7:17 PM, January 12, 2006, Blogger cherish said...


My husband does that with songs. You know that song I just died in your arms tonight. He use to sing that I just died in your arms tonight, it must have been the fart that you laid. To this day everytime I hear that song his version goes in my head. My son has started doing this now. So I have two of them!

I think odd is cool. I love your blog it makes me laugh!

At 7:18 PM, January 12, 2006, Blogger cherish said...

PS Who is Rachel Ray?

At 11:01 PM, January 12, 2006, Blogger No-L said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 11:09 PM, January 12, 2006, Blogger No-L said...


There's been a BIG mistake on this list, it's the #2 one. Natasha is the all star running champion of all car dancing in the land, she's like Miss Universe!

(sometimes drivers make mistakes, sorry about the delete.)

At 1:17 PM, January 13, 2006, Blogger anika said...

How excited am I to be named Car Dancing Champion of Canada?!


(do I get a sash?)


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