Friday, February 03, 2006

WHWLTW Groundhog Superbowl edition

Editors notes: This week's WHWLTW is a teensy-winsy bit early. The reason is, this week I'm going down South-er to help repair some homes that are still damaged after Hurricane Katrina. What? Don't be so surprised. Believe it or not, I have a soft spot in my evil little prune-like heart . That is why I'm volunteering this weekend. Oh and it looks good on my parole sheet and my Webdate Profile.
Now, I realize that I have the construction ability of an armless epileptic monkey, but eh! it's the thought that counts. So later on today I'll be driving down early and I'll be coming back on Sunday. I hope not too late because I want to see the game. But, if you're having a Superbowl party, could you save me some hot wings, your famous dishwashing liquid-flavored soup and that batch of meth you've been saving since last year for occasions like this. Thanks! Now back to our showy-show.

Dear Undies:

It is time once again for America's favorite nonsenical segment here at the U-Corner. It's WHWLTW? For those of you who are visiting for the first and most likely the last time, WHWLTW stands for What Have We Learned This Week. It's sorta like PMS but you can't use it to justify murder. You. Just. Can't.


Anyways, here are the instructions: I tell you what I learned this week and you tell me what you learned. And always remember to keep out of the reach of children or creepy elves.


Yeah, I'm Tawkin' to YOU, Keebler!


Ok, this is what I done learnt.

1. That Walmart has built a new Supercenter 15 minutes from my house. At the same time I saw the 4th horseman of the Apocalypse galloping in my front yard. Don't worry, I clipped him with my shotgun.

2. That when you have an itchy left nipple it is not considered socially acceptable to scratch it.
I actually had to scratch myself by dry-humping a wall. Apparently, that isn't considered socially acceptable either.

3. I was taken to a Coldplay concert in cardboard cut-out form. Thanks Ani. Bubblewrap forever!

4. That I wish I had more time.

5. Our bodies are made of rainbows Here is the proof:
Blood=Red
Ear Wax=Orange
Pee=Yellow
Boogers=Green
Thanks Sadie.

6. Combing your hair with a fork is not as efficient as you might think.

7. Groundhogs are evil, but not as evil as raccoons. As a matter of fact, if a Raccoon sees his shadow on Feb. 2; the Easter Bunny dies.



8. and last but not least I'm tired. Me want to go beddy-bye.


Well, that is what I learned this week. What about you? Let me know, if not make it up.


love,


Undr



PS Thanks for stopping by. I always appreciate your comments, insults and evil-eyes. Love ya, mean it!


Double PS with pesto sauce: Have a great weekend. Go Steelers! Go Seahawks! (I am such a diplomat.)

8 Comments:

At 8:56 AM, February 03, 2006, Blogger beadinggalinMS said...

I learnt this week that is not fun driving in the fog.

I learnt that bloggin friends are the greatest.

I learnt to turn off the phone while watching the last 15 minutes of CSI soo your evil twin will not call and you miss it.

Be careful driving, stay safe see ya when you get back :)

 
At 9:36 AM, February 03, 2006, Blogger cherish said...

I learned that I am never going to beat Linda to your blog to comment. Growlsssssssss

She is just too good for words.

I also learned always edit before hitting submit.

Word verification ghogh I like it!

 
At 2:57 PM, February 03, 2006, Blogger grody jo-dee said...

be carful around the power tools undi! you don't want to get your underoos all caught up.

this is what i learned from a couple of habitat for humanity projects:
watch out for big butch ladies wielding power tools. you don't want to piss them off.

have fun!

 
At 3:59 PM, February 03, 2006, Blogger ramblin' girl said...

I learned that sometimes you can get what you hope for.

have a very safe drive Undr! don't hammer your thumb...

 
At 9:48 PM, February 03, 2006, Blogger SuperSpyGal said...

I learned that you have a big heart !! awwwwwww ;)

Be careful and have a safe trip !

 
At 3:54 PM, February 04, 2006, Blogger Tanya Kristine said...

what's purple? what's blue! come on und'r...

I learned no matter how many times i sweep, tape, de-hair there will always be some somewhere.

i learned you can't get rid of mealy bugs of your basil plant.

i learned that i can get addicted to 24.

 
At 8:39 AM, February 05, 2006, Blogger Carissa said...

I learned that I love diet Black Cherry Vanilla Coke.

I also learned that when they build a new Wal-Mart about 20 minutes away (now our closest), everyone else's lives revolves around it.

 
At 12:48 PM, February 06, 2006, Blogger Shari said...

I KNOW that Walmart is Evil. And, apparently, so are the Steelers.

:)

 

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